Leg Shaving Explained

Posted: June 13, 2010 in It's All Important Stuff

Having just completed my thirtieth year of riding and racing bikes, many aspects of cycling culture are  so integrated with my life that it all feels perfectly normal and logical.  For example, I have been shaving my legs since college.  It would seem totally strange – in fact bizarre and twisted – for me to let it grow.

In 1983, my then new mother-in-law figured this out when she saw bleeding from a nick.  “Why would you do that?” she asked.  I stuttered something about massaging, cleaning out scrapes, blah blah.  The truth is I did it to be like the cool kids.  “Where do you stop?” she inquired, blushing when realizing what she just implied.  “At an appropriate place,” I quipped back.

Over the years I have tried practically every combination of hair removal system thought of.  That being said, I feel qualified to give advice to anyone bending to the social pressure to shave his or her legs.

Liquid hair removal, I am convinced, is made from battery acid.  This is tricky and dangerous stuff.  It does a lousy job of removing hair and you must NEVER let it touch unintended places.  Every brand/product, and I tried them all, realizes similar results.

Having a few minutes of not being prickly is just not achieved with an electric razor.  Electric razors are good for the ‘appearance’ of smoothly shaved legs, but anyone can look closely or touch and call you out.  There are just spots that an electric razor won’t do well and they do more yanking than shaving.  There is no outcome worse than patches of hair on otherwise hairless legs.

So, back to blades we go.  NASA has been working on advanced shaving technology for decades.  OK, maybe just Gillette, but they have come a long way.

Yes, Todd, what is the point?  Well, this is the process that currently works best for me. Like always, there are some secrets.  First of all I start a shower, shut the bathroom door and let the whole room come up to temperature before entering. Anything but warm temperatures makes for goose bumps – bad for knick-free shaving.  I wash all over and rinse – thus raising the temperature of my legs.  Then I apply a liberal dose of Moisturizing Dove Soap on my Fluffy and lather up my legs.

This part is the most scientific part of all…I always shave my lower left leg first, then my knee,and finally upper leg – applying more lathery Dove with my Fluffy to each section.  And, I always shave the outside first, then the inside – more on this logic soon.  Then I switch to the right leg, with the same soap/fluffy routine, except that I always speed up because this process takes fifteen minutes and I get bored and in a hurry.  Rushing and leg shaving are not good together.  So the right leg generally incurs more damage than the left.

The Venus Breeze is the best leg-shaving razor ever. And, the shave gel bars are infused with the fresh scent of white tea to soothe your senses.  If one simply takes their time and doesn’t press too hard and doesn’t seek utter perfection – in other words avoids all ADD and OCD tendencies – this razor is the best.

However, this baby is sharp and leaves the kind of wounds that bleed a lot.  So, the secret to any razor is let someone else break it in.  Always trick your significant other into using new razors, then stealing them as your own. Dull razors don’t work well either.  So, once broken in, don’t ever let anyone else use it.  Keep using it until it literally will no longer work or you drop it and it breaks.  Dull razors are better than new razors – to a point.

Finishing up a previous point.  I always start with the easy parts first so that the blades are less sharp when used on the more sensitive areas.  I might need to rethink this because I also get impatient and speed up as I go. Hmmm.

After rinsing and drying off, and assuming no serious wounds are found, I always liberally apply the greatest shave balm ever. Nivea After Shave Balm for Sensitive Skin will cool the skin and somewhat anesthetizes the damage.

Hey, it ain’t easy being part of the cool kids club.

Advertisements
Comments
  1. Carol says:

    Haha, my teenage daughter raves about that razor too. I’ll have to try it. I always cheap out on myself and use the Venus blue one (preferring to use shave cream)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s